34.) Fresh Air Disease

With all the cars, buildings, factories, and what-not, air pollution in NYC is some of the worst in the country. New York City (Manhattan) has the 3rd highest cancer risk caused by airborne chemicals of all counties in the United States (this entire sentence was copy and pasted from Wikipedia, except this part).

So, you'd think we'd all be wandering about, coughing and wheezing, barely able to breathe. But there is an odd phenomenon that myself and my esteemed colleague Brooke Elsinghorst have discovered (hey, Brooke! You're in my blog). Every time either one of us leaves the city, we get sick. Not death-bed sick, but colds and sniffles. When we come back from the city, we're fine. Now, we're not scientists (though, Brooke has done extensive research on serial killers, which hardly helps in this instance, but is mildly weird, right?), but the evidence is pretty conclusive: New Yorkers become so accustomed to polluted air, that when we encounter fresh air, it makes us sick.

Now, I'm sure the EPA is going to see this and want to do all types of research into the matter, but I'll save them some time and just say "trust me. I'm like 99% sure this is a real thing." Matter settled.

Written By Joe Lankheet
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